My life in 3D

Hey folks! It’s been a while since I’ve done an update on my eyes, so here we go.

Things are ok. Not great, but a lot better than they could be. My left eye is near perfect (20/20 yah!) but right eye is being a stubborn jerk and all the eyedrops in the world didn’t seem to have much of an impact.

That’s right, after two months of trying to fiddle with things and get a full set of working laser eyes, your hero found out he’s going to have to go back in for another surgery sometime in July.

I don’t want to come off like I’m complaining. My docs have been great, and I haven’t had to wear contacts or glasses in two months. That’s a pretty big win. And I’ve finally got all my monitor resolutions back to normal because I can see again. But that’s almost entirely because of my left eye. Right eye has been responsible for dizziness, headaches, and general discomfort.

And then it’s time for a confession. I made a promise to myself that I’d be honest with the blog about the state of my mental health. And I’ve been kind of shirking that responsibility. Turns out, a lot of my social connections are now text based. Writing is my therapy. And for over two weeks, I took all of that away. It sent me into a downward spiral. I was eating too much of food that was terrible for me. I was just sitting in the dark, in silence, because I felt that was all the world had to offer. And I hid away from all my friends because I didn’t want to inflict my mopey ass on them, but more importantly, I didn’t want them to see me weak. I even dodged a visit with my therapist, which is counterintuitive to the whole “going to therapy” thing.

I don’t say this for you to feel sorry for me. A big part of the reason I can talk about this is it’s behind me now. I’ve passed through the other side, if not unscathed, then healing from my self inflicted wounds. I’m saying this so that if you find yourself about to go into a similar situation, you can learn from my mistake. Don’t do it on your own, if you can help it. And if you can, open up, be vulnerable. Let people help. Chances are they want to help you way more than you can imagine.

So, like I said, it’s been kind of a mixed bag, but hopefully I’ll be back in a few months to tell you that the second try was the charm and that I’m right as rain. I can’t promise I won’t lie to you about how I’m doing while I’m healing, but I’m going to try.

5 thoughts on “My life in 3D

  1. I understand your situation – totally. I’ve struggled with depression, sociophobia and fibromyalgia for a long time now, so much so that I had to give up my teaching job. But writing has definitely given me a boost, and allowing myself to seek the help of others was essential.
    Best wishes for your continued recovery – in all senses of the word.

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  2. I had PRK on May 18th and I am having a difficult time with my patience.. 7 days. I haven’t drove my car in 8, I haven’t wore makeup, I don’t work just listen to audiobooks all day, once I did go for a walk however, everything is blurry and I feel no joy not being able to see anything. I need patience to let myself heal, but, I worry that it “didn’t take” and it’s gonna be shitty for 3 months.. thanks for yr post!

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    1. I happen to be a super slow healer (my doc called me the anti-wolverine) and it took me a little over a month to hit 20/20 in the eye that didn’t have any complications (and the complications I had were rare enough they called in three consults for across the state) It sucks, believe me, it sucks, but with any luck, each day you wake up the world will get a little clearer and soon your time spent healing will be a distant memory. Best wishes!

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